This article is a real problem. I’ve thought about submitting to this magazine, but this was not only a very problematic article, but also poorly written. The person who wrote this really should not generalize bisexual people based on (I assume) her own experience.
I understand that half the time they don’t know what they’re talking about in regards to self-injury, but asking me if I would actually do it if I got upset is not an okay question to ask. I would not go to you, I would not talk to you if I wasn’t afraid that I was actually going to hurt myself. This is not something I use to seek attention. I talk about it because I need to distract myself, work things out or to give myself a reason not to hurt myself. It’s been over a year now and I refuse to go back to that cycle of behavior.
Also, do not ask me why I fake happiness. I do not know why I fake it. I just do and it’s outside of my control until I’m put over the edge. I’m beginning to get better about showing and feeling my emotions and my progress is the only thing that matters to me.
I don’t care who knows that I’ve struggled with self-injury because it’s another fucking filibuster and I’m done with all that damn stigma associated with mental illness.
A few weeks ago I told my dad that I wanted to choreograph for the dance minors concert and he told me “I hope you don’t get it.” Today, I decided to tell him off for saying that because I’m going to find out if I got the position in a couple of weeks. When I brought up the dance minor’s concert, my dad said “You got it didn’t you” and he sounded really disappointed. When I told him off for saying that and told him not to jinx me, all he did was laugh and say that he said that only because he doesn’t want me to be stressed out.
My parents think dance is just a hobby, but it helped me get through so much shit in high school and it helps me more than therapy ever did, but they don’t understand that. They don’t think that I can do anything with it because I started when I was 17 so they think I can never be as good as all of the other people who have been dancing their whole lives. I just wish that they could be supportive about the things I care about. I love dance as much as writing and I don’t think I could function as a human being without either of them.